Saturday, April 16, 2011

Natalie's birth story





This blogpost was written by Natalie, Intended Mother

We were so blessed to conceive within the first month of trying, we were overjoyed. We took 3 pregnancy tests "just to make sure!" I had a great non complicated pregnancy. My official due date was October 17, as the day came as passed we grew anxious and even considered all the "labor inducing" tricks. I did not give in and went in for induction at 5:00am on October 29th. It was a loooong painful process. Finally at 11:30 pm I had dilated to a 9.5. I was so excited, yet couldn't get my nerves to settle and the bad feeling out of the pit of my stomach. They told me to take a quick nap until they got everything prepped. I woke up about and hour later. I began pushing at 2:00am and 45 minutes later, our beautiful son was born. James and I couldn't be more excited, tears of joy were pouring out. He was the perfect mix of both of us, those huge eyes melted my heart. They placed him on my chest and a few minutes later they took him to clean him up and take all the usual measurements.

I was getting ready for the after birth, nothing to be concerned about. Everything was going well. The doctor started to stitch me up, thankfully just one...except she noticed I was bleeding on the inside so slowly she was stitching me on the inside what she thought were tears from the baby's head. An hour later and 3 packs of thread, she was starting to get concerned. During this process she began pushing on my uterus in order to make it contract. I was starting to blackout at this point, from the pain of her pushing on my uterus and the loss of blood. The anesthesiologist had come in shortly afterwards to check on my meds. He ran out of the room and ordered the nurses to grab all the bags of blood they could carry. The anesthesiologist ran back into the room with blood in both hands and in each pocket. They couldn't get the blood to stop and told my family they would need to take me into surgery immediately. I was rushed to the OR, thankfully I was the only person in labor that night they used all 14 nurses on staff. I lay on the bed as the prepped the room and me for surgery. I prayed for two things before they began, I prayed that I would make it through safely for my husband and my son and that they would put me under because the pain was so horrible I didn't think I could handle any more. They did a c-section cut and took out my uterus and injected it with steroids and massaged it to try and get it to contract. It seemed to be helping so the Dr. put it back inside and stitched me up. Unfortunately it did not.

They ended up having to go back in and take it back out. My blood pressure plummeted to 30/12 and I had lost 11 pints of blood. They went into the waiting room and told James that they were unable to save my uterus if they did not take it I would not have made it. Once I made it out of the OR they had to warn my family that the way I would look might shock them.They took me into ICU, my family said they couldn't recognize me as I was so swollen, from the blood transfusions to all the fluids they gave me, I was beyond recognition. I was supposed to be in ICU under sedation for at least 48 hours with a breathing tube to assist my breathing. At that point I was still critical due to all the fluid in my lungs and the stress on my kidney. The nurses told my family they would have to leave the room. I had become agitated and restless. I was kicking a throwing my arms every time they would come in. 4 hours later......I opened my eyes finally my mom came in and showed me pictures of Hunter assuring me that he was safe and nothing was wrong. I began to settle down. The last thing I remembered before I went under sedation was them taking my son into the OR with me and subconsciously I must have been worried there was something wrong they weren't telling me.

I remember opening my eyes seeing my amazing husband and my father by my side, I was still unable to talk because I still had a breathing tube. I motioned for a piece of paper the first question I wrote, to my husband was "were you scared? and did they take my uterus?" The next thing I remember was my gorgeous sister in law by my side, I was so thirsty and they wouldn't let me drink anything because of the concern that I might choke on the water. Tiffany was feeding me ice cubes with a spoon for at least an hour. She might have even snuck a couple sips of water :) All I wanted at this point was to see my son. Since I was in ICU they were worried about bringing a newborn in with all of the germs. They also had a security bracelet on Hunter so they had to figure out how to rig the system to get him out of the nursery to the ICU. 7 hours later I was able to meet my son again. I never imagined the love I could feel so quickly. He was so beautiful and such a blessing. I thank God that my uterus did its job to deliver my healthy son. I did not want to let him go.

I was transferred to the mother unit with my son the next day it felt like a year since I had seen him. Once I had him in my arms I was so afraid to let him go. He didn't leave my arms for 2 weeks. The nurses couldn't believe I had come out over everything so quickly. The doctors came in to check on me and they were all in tears. Seeing me alive holding my son, none had seen such a scary situation come out with such a happy ending. I thank my son, Hunter for giving me the strength and the drive to make it so quickly. I look back now and cannot believe what I went through in such a short amount of time. I feel so blessed to have such an amazing son and such an amazing support system with my family. I felt love that I could never explain in a lifetime.

A week later the reality started to sink in. I would no longer be able to have the big family I have always dreamed about.....Tiffany came over one afternoon to take Hunters newborn pictures. We were sitting on the couch after we were done talking about everything, loss, miracle of life, when Tiffany blurts out "Can I be your surrogate??" We both began balling. I feel so blessed to have come out of this situation. All the doctors were so amazing, I feel God was truly looking out for me that day. It has been a really rough road, I feel like I have lost part of mywomanhood. I have had to go through the same greiving process as I would have if I lost a loved one. This is going to be a long scary process but I truly believe there is a plan for us. We are so lucky to have Tiffany in our lives....

8 comments:

  1. Natalie - this was so touching, sad, inspiring. You are such a strong, amazing women. You are very brave to share with everyone and hopefully you will be someone others can connect with who have gone through similar losses in their lives. I will write on the experience soon too and how we all thought we might lose you forever. I am so lucky to have you as my sister (in law) and your entire family now too. Life is good. I'm glad I get to go through it with you and so happy you and my brother have such a strong love. You two are inspirational. I am so very proud of who you are.

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  2. Oh Natalie! I had no idea. What a scary/crazy ordeal!!! Thank goodness you are ok and here to enjoy your beautiful baby boy. What a blessing to have someone like Tiffany who will be there to carry your next bundle of joy. :) Thinking about you guys and excited to follow your story!

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  3. I tears rolling down my cheeks as read your story. Both of us are blessed to have Tiffany in our lives and I am so glad that she is able to give you this gift. Although I do not know you I will be following your story.

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  4. This touched me so much. I've known Tiffany since she was little and always knew she was meant to be something and someone truly special. What a scary time that must have been for all of you. I am praying for you in this endeavor.

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  5. This just brought tears to my eyes. Re-living this and to be reminded how lucky we all are that our two families joined. Tiffany, you are such an amazing person. I feel the need to thank you for your limitless selflessness and doing this for our siblings. I admire you so much. And of course love my sissy beyond words. And I hope I can call you a sister as well.

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  6. What an incredible story and a heart filling one at that. This brought tears to my eyes for so many reasons, but mainly because of all the love and strength in it. I'll be following your story and sending positive thoughts to you and Tiffany this winter. :)

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  7. I have been following your blog for a while now, and I have come to be able to read and comment on your story just now. I lost my first pregnancy at 5 months, and lost my 2nd pregnancy at 10 weeks to a cervical pregnancy. My situation is so very similar to yours, as I also hemorrhaged and lost my uterus in emergency surgery in August 2011. I have been trying to save my pennies for surrogacy and hope to someday be in your same shoes. A family and to be a mother is all I have ever wanted.

    I really hope this 2nd time is the charm for you guys!! I am praying for a sticky bean!!!!

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  8. A friend of mine just directed me to your blog and as I read this post I am bawling my eyes out. I am currently 23 weeks pregnant with twins, as a surrogate mother. You are so very lucky to have a sister-in-law willing to do this for you. Your story is inspiring and I can't wait to keep reading.

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